I've got wood
*rolls eyes*
The tore out the carpet today and started refinishing the hardwood floors underneath. It's going to be cool when it's finished. If my bro or sis in-law read this do not tell the 'rents. We want to surprise them for their upcoming visit.
The sander started and the MNA was not thrilled. I held her so she could watch but she wanted out. So I put her on the stairs and she went up too my room to hide. She is chill with it now.
We picked up Moms and went out to grab lunch. Hit a sandwich shop. Good eats as usual.
I'll post pics of the progress from the work in progress. Been taking pics off and on.
~The Dad
Break out the wooden stakes
If she starts asking for goth clothes I will bury her in the back yard.
~The Dad
Yikes and away
My rat bastich friend Tarn insidiously planted the seed in my mind while visiting her and her family to start back with an MMORPG. This MMO is a spin off of one I used to play City of Heroes (CoH). This one is City of Vilians (CoV). You play a bad guy with super powers who goes around doing bad things like robbing banks.
I loved playing CoH as the good guy. It's wicked cool (that was for you Tarn) to be the e-vile SOB.
~The Dad
More potty training
Once this starts working out I'll slowly peel away each layer until she eventually is potty trained. That or until my brain implodes.
~The Dad
My poor wife
I had butt burped getting her ready for her nap and excused myself. I was copied. I saw a pattern forming.
We had finished eating dinner. I had a mouth burp from the Pepsi Max I was drinking. The MNA did it too and said she was just like daddy.
It seems I have a mini-me. My wife is less then impressed.
Muahahahaha
She just took her clothes off so I could put on her PJ's. She is running around naked. She just bent over saying,"I'm trying to look at my butt". She almost pitched over head first.
I wonder if I could blame that one on my wife...
Nah, no one would believe me.
~The Dad
Costumes at the Museum
I do not know where to begin. This was a geek paradise. I took notes on the exhibits that stood out the most.
Misc:
Highlander - Connor MacLeod's opening sequence Scottish outfit worn by Christopher Lambert.
Ghost Busters - Dr. Raymond Stantz's jumpsuit with nuclear regulator backpack worn by Dan Akroyd
Battle Star Galactica (current series) - Viper Pilot suit
Blade Runner - Replicant Pris outift worn by Darryl Hannah
Batman (original tv series) - Robin costume worn by Burt Ward
Batman (1997 Movie) - Infamous nipple costume worn by George Clooney
Raiders of the Lost Ark - Indiana Jones's whip used by Harrison Ford and Staff of Ra headpiece
Raiders of the Lost Ark The Last Crusade - Leather jacket worn by Harrison Ford and Holy Grail (SOMEONE INFORM THE CAST OF SPAMALOT ASAP!)
Star Trek:
Star Trek (original series) - Captain James T. Kirk's Gold Tunic worn by William Shatner in episode "Mirror, Mirror"1967, Dr. Leonard "Bones" McCoy's Enviro Suit worn by DeForest Kelly in episode "The Tholian Web" 1968, Klingon Warror Uniform
Star Trek: Voyager - 7 of 9's outfit worn by Jeri Ryan (holy hell is she short)
Star Wars:
Star Wars and The Empire Strikes Back - Darth Vader's Costume worn by David Prouwse with Light Saber, Storm Trooper Helmet and Blaster, Obi-Wan's Jedi Robes worn by Sir Alec Guinness, Luke Skywalker's Light Saber used by Mark Hamill
The Empires Strikes Back - Luke Skywalker's severed hand
I can't believe what cool costumes they had. The Star Wars ones where my favorites.
It is funny how when up close and personal how cheesey the older ones looked. Robin's costume look like it was sewed by a 6th grader in home ec. The Darth Vader costume was by far the coolest. The helm with it was a stunt helm according to the placard. You could see how beat up it was. If only it could talk and tell how each one happened.
~The Dad
Irresponsible parents and gaming
Been having ups and downs with the gym. Once I get back into shape it will get better. Until then I can still ogle some MILFs in the evenings.
I traded in some controllers and games and picked up Half-Life, The Orange Box, Dual Shock 3 controller, PS3 remote control and the membership club doohicky at GameStop. Magazine was not a major selling point. The extra credit on turn ins was. All that ended up costing me under $26 bucks in the end.
I have not played any of the HLF series and was only going to go with The Orange Box but my Aussie Daughter Zany talked me into starting with the original before hitting The Orange. No she is not my daughter. The young lady is attending University and it's a joke because I am old enough to be her dad. That and her mom was hot back then...
Have been bookmarking different things around the web to blog about. The list is growing daily so I need to start working them. Here is the first.
Since I was just talking about gaming I am going to being with Grand Theft Childhood. In this day and age of knee jerk media who scream video games are the devil at fault every time there is a shooting on a school campus or a kid looks at another kid wrong there needs to be some legit facts on the topic, not some pundits made up lies that he gets busted on later.
Check out that link to learn more about kids and video games. Here is some info quoted from whattheplay.com about the book:
"In 2004, Drs. Lawrence Kutner and Cheryl K. Olson, co-founders and directors of the Harvard Medical School Center for Mental Health and Media, began a $1.5 million study funded by the U.S. Department of Justice on the effects of video games on young teenagers. In contrast to previous research, they studied real children and families in real situations. Drawing on their research and other studies worldwide, they wrote Grand Theft Childhood: The Surprising Truth About Violent Video Games and What Parents Can Do (Simon & Schuster, 2008). "
Here is my common sense advice to parents of gamers. Just like you decide what shows your kid is allowed to watch based on their maturity level and the shows ratings (you do know you responsible parents are SUPPOSED to do this don't you?) you need to do the same with video games.
Letting little Johnny run in and get any game he wants by handing it to you so he can avoid the store policy of not selling to the underaged puts YOU at fault for letting little Johnny play it. Same with buying it for him as a gift. If you are not gaming savvy take the five minutes to google it or at least read the damn box and check out the rating for it.
I am a gamer. My generation is the first generation to grow up with video games. We are still a strong demographic buying games today.
My daughter will be one of the lucky kids who will be brought up responsibly gaming. We have a Wii and PS3 in the house and I am sure we will have whatever new consoles come out as she gets older. Not for just for her. I buy them for me but I sure as hell know she will enjoy using them too.
It's doesn't take a rocket surgeon to teach your kid how to frag. It takes a responsible parent to balance it out with schoolwork and such.
Spamalot
Lesson learned: Do not buy tickets online without being damn sure of seat location. To say we had the furthest seats from the stage would be an exaggeration. There was actually one row behind us. As funny as the evening was I feel we missed out on some of the humor not being able to read the up close facial expressions of the actors.
The show was pure Monty Python from beginning to end. They took the story line (and some pages directly from the script) from the Holy Grail. Then they added modern references to new scenes/jokes. At one point they even threw in some local humor as they most likely do at every stop on the tour. Nothing wins an audience over more then jokes they can relate too.
Thumbs up overall. I still feel I missed out on some of it so I can't give it the high rating I gave Iron Man.
In case you missed it reading my prior blogs I am a fat ass. I don't sugar coat it and I sure as hell don't get insulted over it. It is a plain fact. So as I squash my fat ass into the seat (mental image of how they make sausages) I sit with the Mrs and wait for the place to fill up. We had arrived early.
Eventually a women arrived who was also a fat ass. She wedged into the seat next to me. Now as much as you prefer to have no contact with the person sitting next to you in any theatre it was going to happen. Put two Notsogreatwhite Whales in a small aquarium and they have not choice but to touch.
There is also an character of fat that skinny people do not understand. Fat attracts fat. It is why people get fatter. You gain a bit of fat and it does whatever it can to gain more. Misery might love company but fat brings them all to the party. So there I am with my left leg stuck like velcro to Jabba the Hutt sitting next to me.
At this point and time I find out one of the two less endearing traits of my new sister in bloat is she is a leg tapper. As the music started she tapped here foot on the ground, bouncing her leg (yes, and then mine) to the beat. I would like to think she tried to do it with the beat but either she has the coordination of Stephen Hawking or the delay of the energy traveling through the pools of fat was noticeable.
Being nice and not wanting to create a scene with appropriate body language and exasperated sounds she would stop. Then a few minutes later would start again. She and the harpy she arrived with also had the habit of pointing out everything on the stage as it happened and explained it.
"Get it? He's not dead yet! It's a joke about him almost being dead!"
You do not know how much restraint it took.
When I desire I have remarkable restraint. I used up my yearly allotment in the first act.
I noticed 4 opened seats in a row one row down more towards center stage. At intermission while the Mrs took off to the pisser I moseyed on down to the seats. I inquired nicely if anyone was sitting there and was told the people there had up and left after a few minutes and had not come back.
I decided to try my luck and sat down. A few minutes later a guy walks up and asks for the water bottles in the seats. I had put them in one of the empty seats and handed them over. I asked him if these seats were his. He confirmed this then told me his tale.
It seems his 9 year old son realized he was scared of heights. So badly he couldn't sit there. So they uprooted and talked to the ushers. After some time they found them seats that were not in use and gave them those seats to enjoy the show. They had balcony seats in prime location. Who said vertigo was always a bad thing?
He gave his blessing to use the seats and took off. The Mrs came back and I caught her up to speed. So we went from annoying ass people sitting next to us in our seating to seats where we had no one sitting on the other sides. It was most glorious.
~The Dad
And now for something completely different
We have a babysitter.
We have tickets for tonight.
Game on.
~The Dad
The girl has taste
I could have gone longer but I stopped myself at 30 minutes. Didn't want to overdo it. Glad I did. Mowed the backyard for the first time of the year later on in the day and my legs are spent.
Picked up the MNA from pre-school. Was driving down the road when she informed me,"I sang Happy Birthday".
I asked,"Who's birthday was it?
She said,"A friend". In her pre-school they call all the kids friend if they don't remember the name. I guess it beats calling them names they hear at home.
I queried,"Did you enjoy singing to your friend?"
It was at this exact point in her development my daughter took a big step in her life. She matured and hit the next level. She had realized one of life's most important philosophies.
She responded,"It's all about the cupcake".
~The Dad
Da pain, da plane
If I can hit that 500 calories spent in 30 minutes by then I plan on staying at that level for a few days, possibly a week. Depends on how I feel. Need to let my body acclimate before I push on towards getting back into the exercise level I was prior to being ill.
I feel I'm pushing harder then I should now. That is why I am going to plateau once I hit 30 mins. I have to keep reminding myself it's a marathon not a race.
A cool note is my chest/arms are sore as shit from the personal trainer yesterday. I love that feeling. Let's you know you're alive and actually doing something besides Cheetos and porn. Orange dick syndrome is just not right. WASH THEM HANDS PERV! This has been a Public Service Announcement.
Anyone remember the old TV show Fantasy Island? The two main characters on every week were Mr. Roarke (Ricardo Montalban) and Tattoo (Herve Villachez). Herve was Vertically Challenged. No that sounds like he is deficient. He was gravity enhanced.
I got home from the gym
and the Mrs, MNA and Boxers are in the backyard. The
Mrs is working her veggie garden.
The MNA sees an airplane flying overhead and starts
yelling,"AIRPLANE!".
So as I see my midget in the yard shouting like that
I correct her. "No honey, it's Da Plane, Da Plan."
Now she is yelling,"DA PLANE!"
Now I just need a white suit. I wonder if Omar the
Tent Maker has enough linen?
Afterwards I break out the tricycle. It's the Radio
Flyer brand (purveyor of little red wagon's world
wide). It's older, all metal and a bit heavy. Her
legs are just a little too short for the pedals so
they slip off now and then. She has the concept of
pedaling down. It's the whole steering issue.
At one point she went on the grass and got stuck. She
got off walked around front. She grabbed the
handlebars and moves them around 180 degrees to turn
the tricycle around . So they are facing backwards
but the tire is still aimed for a straight line. She
pushes the tricycle and it reversed straight and
didn't turn around. She then rather seriously
informed me the bicycle was broken.
I think I'll pay some student driver company to teach
her to drive if this is a glimpse into the future.
~The Dad
Official stats and new royalty
I was pulling out of a parking lot with the Mrs and MNA. There is a little girl I'm guessing was 4 years old. She had a frilly dress on with patent leather boots with straps for effect. Mrs and I laughed and thought it was cool.
I said the MNA should take notes. I then told her she was a kick butt princess. She laughed and repeated it.
I asked her,"Who is a kick butt princess?"
She replied,"ME!"
I asked her who else was a kick butt princess?"
She replied,"Moms"
Then she reflected briefly and said,"Daddy you are a butt princess."
She's three years old. I'm screwed when she is a teenager.
~The Dad
Sweating as an oldie
Yesterday's first day back was just under 16 minutes for a paltry 12.5 calories per minute. Todays was 20 minutes for 16.85 calories spent per minute which is the pace I want. Now I need to keep that up while working on increasing my endurance back up to an hour.
I said I put back on 5 of the 21 lost yesterday. Today showed it was 7. Tomorrow is my official weigh in. Whatever that weigh in shows goes in the spread sheet I use to track and is gospel. Yes, I just laughed at my fatty stats being recorded on my "spread" sheet.
My trainer (he beats on me twice a week) breaks out the tape measure and calipers along with standing on the scale at least once a month. The last time I did that was a day or two before I was sidelined. Going to be ugly to see how much I backslid tomorrow morning.
I was all set to break out a post on Reverend Jeremiah Wright today but lost the mojo. I know what I want to write, I just need to get my mojo back on the topic to write it up for blog.
Goddamn it, one of my Boxers just fouled the air in the room. I'm guessing it's deaf girl. Yes she really is deaf. She also has been dropping ass all night so she is guilty as far as I'm concerned. At this point I'm ready to take one of the menthol cough drops from the cup on my desk and play enema with it in hopes my eyes stop watering.
Hrm....old man locker room -v- Boxer ass. My sinuses are going on strike comparing the two. Add crappy diaper stench and you are in my world. You'd be grumpy too.
~The Dad
Iron Man gets a gauntleted thumbs up
It's about damn time.
Don't get me wrong. I grew up a HUGE Spider-Man fan.
I love the X-men. I'm a Marvel fan through and
through. But Iron Man, this movie put the Super back
in Super Hero.
None of this pussy emo Peter Parker crap. None of the
annoying love triangles with Wolvering/Cyclops/Jean
Grey. None of this horny teen that can't do more then
dry hump with Rogue. No, this time we have a fuck you
very much man who knows what he wants and isn't
afraid to do it.
Sure there is the love interest with Stark and and
Pepper Pots. It is just that. They know it, they
flirt about it, there is no ZOMG we
can/can't/can/can't/can bullshit love story. It's
there and it's in the flirtation stage. They damn
well know how important they are to each other and
are being given time to play out and not just be a
fast plot device to tug on your heart strings.
It was refreshing to see a guy do it his way and be
the hero. Sure he started off the womanizer, rich
bitch playboy. They did that to show his immaturity.
Once he had his epiphany he dropped that and manned
up. That and Paltrow in a backless dress is top
shelf.
I'm looking forward to the sequel(s). I only hope
they keep each movie self contained. None of this
bullshit like PoTC where the first movie was one
story then the next two where drawn out cross-overs.
There will still be character development and such
from movie to movie but they need one main plot that
starts and ends with each episode.
One thing I really enjoyed was the armor itself.
There was no art director who tried to re-make iit in
his own artsy-fartsy way that made baby Budda cry
because it resembled nothing of the original. . They
didn't try to over think it and make it futuristic.
They did it right and it kicked ass. Major props to
those involved in the process from concept to
implementation.
There were a few sections that made me want to pull
my hair out (if I had any after my buzz cuts) for
example like him sitting on the unsecured wheel chair
in the back of the cargo plane. That fucker would
have been a ping-pong ball on tumble dry.
There was also a moment I flipped out. In the
beginning when the show him working in his lab to
some music right before Pepper enters the room and he
tells her to not turn his music down I went nuts.
During the 80s punk had morphed into a a different
style of punk. Back when you could still call it punk
music. The song Institutionalized by Suicidal
Tendencies is one of the best examples of the style.
~The Dad
Assessing the damage
I know I can drop that weight and get back into gear. The only problem is getting back into work out shape. The average male requires 2,000 calories a day and the average female requires 1,800. My personal best on the elliptical was 1,211 calories in one hour. Today I barely missed doing 16 minutes and and my calories spent was pathetic.
My immediate goal is to get myself back into workout shape so I can do the hour. After I hit that I will work on heart rate and calories burned.
Today I was made the mistake of having the fan blow on me during the workout. Normally this is a good thing but cold air triggers my cough and that was a big mistake. That was the biggest reason I had to get off the machine.
You don't eat prior to working out. You don't want the blood rushing to your stomach to digest food when you need it other places. This was a good thing today. Not eating means I only dry heaved thanks to my esophagus/silent reflex problem. I expected some issues and got hit with that one. I'm looking forward to going back to the Gym tomorrow sans fan and see how I do.
I'm very competitive and for once this is working out in my favor. I can't stand not doing as well as my average when going to they gym and I often try to outdo myself. If I use my head this is just good old fashion motivation as long as I don't over do it.
I made it back for the first time after a month off. I pushed myself without getting hurt. I have a base line to improve from. Looking back on today's results they ended up a bit better then I expected.
Suck it up and drive on.
~The Dad
eeeeeeeeee
I finished A Spell for Chameleon today, the first Xanth book. It was as cool as I remembered. Piers Anthony rocks just as hard today as he did in Middle School.
The MNA did great on her sticker potty chart. Except for one setback where she half pooped in her trainers and half pooped in the bowl she was spot on today. I'm proud of her. Here's hoping this method does the trick.
I was telling my wife about my visit to the E/N/T Doc the other day and she thought it was worthy of blogging. I also found out yesterday she reads my blog. She asked me if that was a problem. I responded,"Nope, if you get offended it's your problem." I know how incredibly callous this sounds but she gets me. She knows this is my place to soapbox and if it bugs her she can always change the channel and not watch the show.
So, my appointment with the E/N/T went like t his. I was coughing up a lung or three or in the waiting room. They had me fill out all the forms. He was not part of my health care system so I had to fill out additional forms and it was my first time there, yada yada. After a bit in this small closet sized waiting room they call me in.
The wait wasn't too long for the Doc once I was in the exam room. The room was similar to an eye Doc's exam room just no huge overhead mask contraption. He walks in and does the usual jocular how you doing here is the canned open quip to put no one at ease. He was cast in the mold of a 90's sitcom dad. Cross between Alan Thicke (Growing Pains) and Richard Mulligan (Empty Nest).
He grabs one of those dental mirrors but longer and a gauze pad. He takes the gauze pad and has me extend my tongue. He grips my tongue using the gauze for traction. While holding my tongue outside of my mouth he pushes the mirror halfway down my throat and then says,"OK, make a high pitched elongated E sound."
I do my best. He then says,"No, more like eeeeeeeeee". So there I am with my tongue being held, a metal rod halfway down my throat and this Dr. is just making shit up at this point. You know he is just waiting to go back to the Dr. break room and tell the story how he got the fat gullible guy to squeal like a pig as he held his tongue.
Weirdness of the visit aside he seems to have found the cure. I'm doing better and plan on heading back out to the Gym this week. Before this crap started I was going daily. I have to get back into the swing of things. I have my trainer on Tue/Thur. I am guessing I will get 3-4 days in this week and see how I feel before I get back to my 7 days.
I'm hoping within 2 weeks I can get back into the heavy cardio workouts daily. I'm sure this absence from the gym from being sick has done nothing but set me back on my weight and caliper/measuring tape stats. I will just use that for fuel. I knew I had dropped 20 lbs by the time I was sick. I know I can get back to that and much more.
That or I will save time and have my fatty funereal at a Cinnabon so they can just box me up where I go down.
~The Dad
The magic of Xanth and potty training charts
My sister had brought the first book home from the library. I devoured after she had read it. I got my hands on the rest through Jazz.
In Middle School (6th through 8th grade) I had a friend called Jazz (was the short version of his long ass Polish surname). He had a grandmother who liked to spend money on him. She bought him books. He had the rest of the series and I had to bug him for them. I still remember standing by the lockers as he dug out the next book to loan me.
I still keep in touch with Jazz. He is a happily married man with two daughters. I have no problem picturing him that way. What blows my mind is he is a HS teacher. Not only that but he seems to really dig it. Just weird knowing the friend you sat next to in class is now the teacher. No matter how old we get never outgrow how we see ourselves and others to a certain degree.
So I grabbed 5 of the first 6 in the series. Centaur Aisle (book #4) was not in but I put a hold on it. Was in stock at another library not far off. I'll have it sometime next week. Started reading the first book (A Spell for Chameleon).
We had to go back to potty training basics with the MNA. She had a did a total revert. The 2 week trip out east didn't help.
Today we made a big deal out of it. She and I went to Staples. Bought some big colored poster boards (5 to a pack). She and I made the chart together on the living room floor. Now every time she goes potty in the toilet she gets a sticker to put on the board for that day. I randomly throw in a huge smiley face sticker to keep it fresh.
She is very excited over the stickers routine. The funniest is when she uses the upstairs toilet. She has to run downstairs before she even puts her training pull up back on to put the sticker up. I hope she keeps digging this method.
This has potential to be a better method then the old one of giving treats. The problem with that was she would save it up and let loose 2 drops just for the treat. 3 minutes later she would do it all again, rinse/repeat. The treats became the focus for her, not the potty. This new method should work better for her personality. Time will tell.
~The Dad
Who does Jesus pray to right before you pull the trigger?
You always hear people bitching about how kids today are spoiled or lazy. Well I must say. This fellow is the exception to the rule. Killing others to carry out his plan is despicable. Killing himself to take out the son of god, now that is motivation.
Found out today NCSoft has an MMO planned for release on the PS3 in 2009. I'm sure every other gamer knew this already. I'm a sucker for MMOs and thought I had escaped when I went pure console gamer when I switched to Mac. Sneaky bastards found a way to slip one in there. I'm doooooomed.
Was reading an article yesterday about deep fried coke.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!
As a fat ass, SUV driving US citizen even I sit there and think this is so far over the deep end Richard Simmons doesn't have enough energy to chase it down.
It is that time of year again that manly men start thinking of grilling outdoors. My one neighbor already has his out and in position. Not sure if he has fired it up yet. I mentioned to my wife last week while at my in-law's we should break out the veggie rack. I like to do either brats or burgers with charcoal grilled veggies. Damn fine meal there.
My grill is about 5 years old now. Wonder when I can start looking for a new one. I wonder how tough it would be to sneak one of these past her.
~The Dad